Remembrance

I sit here watching my little guy swinging in his swing and fast asleep. I can't help but think back to the day that he was born. Tomorrow he will be 12 weeks old. I can't believe how fast time has gone. Every day that I celebrate this new life, I can't help but think back to the lives of those I've lost.

August was one year since we lost my Grandma Martin. Life without her has continued on but not without thoughts of what she might be thinking or saying if she were still here with us today. I thought of her the day that Jackson was born. I could just imagine her excitement as she received the phone call that her great-grandson was born.

This month will be five years since my brother, Phil, passed away. I know I post about this every year, but it is really laying heavy on my heart this year. For those of you who don't know, about a month after my niece was born, Phil found out that he had Hodgkin's Lymphoma. I was devastated. Why would this happen to my family . . . to his family? I didn't understand at the time. Now that I think back, I know it was all in God's sovereign plan. I wish so much that my brother could meet my little son. I can imagine him saying, "I can't believe my little sister has a kid of her own." I wish he were here so that he could see his nephew. At least I know that both he and my grandma are smiling down on little Jack.

The last week, I have also been reflecting on the lives lost on September 11, 2001. I remember that I was in college and had just gotten out of my 8 o'clock class when a friend told me that a plane had crashed into one of the towers of The World Trade Center. I remember going to the snack shop and watching the t.v. in there just as the second plane crashed in the the second tower. You could hear a pin drop, it was so quiet. We were all in shock. That is when we knew that this was more than just an accident. Our country was under attack. In chapel, the president of our school told us that classes would be cancelled for the rest of the day. I don't remember much else from the rest of that day, other than I was able to call my mom on the phone and talk to her. It took a while to get through with my calling card (I didn't have a cell phone back then). I just remember that I was a little scared and we talked about how something like this could happen to a country like the United States.

So, this month is a month of remembrance for me. Remembering the birth of my son, the lives of my grandmother and brother, and the lives of those lost on September 11 and the days following. We don't know why God chooses the paths for us that He does. But we do know that He does it to show His sovereign will. Here are some verses that I have found helpful in the past:

Philippians 4:6-Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

Psalm 20:7-Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; But we will remember the name of the LORD our God.

Jeremiah 17:7-Blessed in the man who trusts in the LORD, and whose hope is the LORD.

Nahum 1:7-The LORD is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; and He knows those who trust in Him.

Psalm 18:30a-As for God, his way is perfect.

Psalm 27:1-The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Psalm 37:3-8-Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; do not fret--it only causes harm.